As we approach the end of the year, it's a perfect time to reflect on the past year and set new goals for the upcoming one. At Whole Warrior Solutions, we believe in taking a holistic approach to goal-setting. This means not just looking at the tangible achievements but considering how our mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being contributes to our success.
To start, take inventory of the past year. What were your biggest accomplishments? What challenges did you face? What did you learn about yourself? Once you have a clear understanding of the past, you can start thinking about the future. When setting new goals, it's essential to make them SMART - Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Time-bound. This approach ensures that goals are clear, concise, and actionable. For example, instead of setting a goal to "get in shape," make it more specific by saying "exercise for 30 minutes, three times a week." Another critical aspect of setting new goals is to make sure they align with your values and priorities. At Whole Warrior Solutions, we provide person-centred services by considering each client's unique needs. Similarly, when setting new goals, make sure they are meaningful to you and align with your values. As a trauma-informed organisation, we understand that setting new goals can be overwhelming, especially if you've experienced trauma in the past. Take small steps and be kind to yourself along the way. Remember, progress is progress, no matter how small. Reach out if you'd like help with this. As we move forward into the New Year 2024, let's remember to approach goal-setting holistically, taking into account our mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. By setting SMART goals aligned with our values and taking small, intentional steps, we can achieve anything we set our minds to. For empowerment with developing SMART goals reach out today! Engage in one of our services including life coaching, startup business coaching, counselling or psychosocial recovery coaching or support coordination. There's a few more tips on manifestation in the graphic below. Write the vision and believe in yourself! Happy new year! Light and Love Tania x
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Having worked in child protection for 13 years I am disgusted and disappointed at the recent behaviour of the Dalai Lama. His behaviour involved abuse of power when he was observed on video giving a young boy about 9 years old a command to 'suck my tongue'. Tongues and genitals should be reserved for intimate relationships where there is cognitive ability to consent. The discourse that has followed is of concern with various cultural groups justifying his behaviour as a cultural norm in Tibet (but he lives in China!). What is also concerning is the 'group think' mentality of the observers cheering it on. Child safety trumps cultural norms and I believe he should be sacked from his role.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a mental health condition that is triggered by a traumatic event. Symptoms of PTSD may include flashbacks, nightmares, severe anxiety, and uncontrollable thoughts about the event. People with PTSD may also experience difficulty sleeping, depression, difficulty concentrating, and increased feelings of stress or fear. Treatment for PTSD often involves cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), medication, or other NDIS supports and support from family and friends.
Living with PTSD can be a difficult and isolating experience, but there is hope. Recovery is possible with the right support, understanding and resources. At Whole Warrior Solutions, we understand that managing recovery can be overwhelming, which is why we provide comprehensive counselling services to help you through challenging times. The journey of a childless woman presents many twists and turns. Those childless by choice may revel in the control of their decision to live a childfree life. Those childless by circumstance, may however experience inequality and varying socio-economic status across the lifespan. The journey of infertility often negatively impacts relationships, health, social status, and wellbeing.
Famous childless women such as Oprah, Cameron Diaz, Dame Helen Mirren, Condoleezza Rice have worked for causes they believe in, overcame the inequity of stigma and the gender pay gap. Yet many childless women experience invisible heartache, social discrimination, relationship pressures and situational decline in mental health (Graham, 2015). Causes of infertility may comprise 50% endometriosis (La Rosa etal, 2020), and varying percentages of PCOS, pelvic inflammatory disease, fibroids and other issues. Sometimes it is also the man who is infertile. The length of time and number of medical interventions attempted prior to and after diagnosis may also negatively impact earning potential, mental health and finances. The meaning of life! What is it, how do you find it and when do you arrive at it? The meaning of life is often pondered at times of profound grief. The type of gut wrenching, knock the wind out of you, can't get out of bed for six months grief. Ever been there? Maybe you're there right now. Posturing the circle of life, balancing on the edge of a high place, or laying in the depths of sorrow. To love is often associated with risk of grief.
To love is to become attached to another person or animal. The recent outpouring of sadness for the koalas lost and injured in the Australian bushfires demonstrated Australia's love of our iconic bears. The depth of collective sadness was remarkable. In contrast, what about a parent's private and protracted grief after the loss of an adult child to suicide. Sadly stigma and shame can be a barrier to an outpouring of support for the bereaved. I think about my mother who cared for her husband who lived with the slow progression of vascular dementia for 23 years. At the end of his life she put on his bronze memorial plaque 'My chains are gone!'. It struck me as a remarkable celebration of his freedom and a sign that she had already grieved the loss of the man she loved. The way we grieve is therefore affected by the circumstances. Expressions of grief in some families may not be tolerated in other societies. When my new husband was diagnosed with a terminal illness I'll never forget how I felt. I think I mentioned it earlier...gut wrenching, knock the wind out of you, can't get out of bed for six months type of feeling. Yet he reacted in the opposite way that was foreign to me. Nobody was right or wrong. It's messy, this grief thing. It's intangible and foul smelling if we let it. Complicated grief can happen when it goes on a very very long time. Theorists have debated models of grief for centuries...Freud, Shear, Wagner, Warden to name a few. What seems to affect the way we cope with grief is things like how attached we are to the person, personality, spiritual beliefs, complicating factors like mental health, abuse, culture, social norms and circumstances of death to name a few (Hall, 2011). Grief is a really personal thing. Nurses stepped up a notch when my loved one entered palliative care. The outpouring of empathy, kindness, consideration for the little things was outstanding. It made the whole death thing somehow tolerable. Do doctors crank up the morphine and teeter it to the edge of what some may call euthanasia...so that it is 'a good death'. It spared the patient from the depths of physical pain. Come to think of it I've been present when three loved ones have been in palliative care. The pattern each time was doctors releasing them from suffering. I recall my ethics professor discussing Thompson's famous violinist case...which illustrated when making decisions about life and death always consider is it 'for the greater good'. Quite an ethical dilemma...the euthanasia debate. Which brings me back to the meaning of life. We critically analysed abortion for 13 weeks in my philosophy class...I remember wishing I could do my essay on the ethics of euthanasia because it was more topical for me at the time. In studying ethics, I reflected on the social conditioning and institutionalisation I had been exposed to in my lifetime and how it had impacted my choices. At the end of the circle of life, personally I want to know I have lived a good life? Have I been kind, ethical, responsible, considerate of others in my choices and behaviour. Just being a decent human being, living life for the greater good seems enough for me. Kinda makes me want to start a kindness epidemic with so many doing it tough! Support for grief and loss support is available. #philosophy #circleoflife #bereavement #grief #griefandloss #death #life #meaningoflife #palliativecare #naturaldisasters #bushfires #suffering #euthanasia #resilience #makenewmeaning #loss #griefsupport #griefjourney #griefandloss #love #grieving #mentalhealth #healing #death #lifeafterloss #bereavement #depression #childloss #hope #babyloss #griefawareness #anxiety #miscarriage #support #widow #griefsucks #family #stillbirth #selfcare #griefrecovery #infantloss #pregnancyloss “The thing that was most helpful in my healing journey was ...” This was the question I asked a group of women this week. You see, they are the courageous survivors of modern slavery. Their answers are profound ... 'Being able to “talk” about it all, once I escaped. My family heard it all over and over ... it had all been suppressed for 10 years ... threats that if I told anyone, I would be dead ... I would never see my kids again ... you will cop it ... etc etc!' 'I did a course on healing from co-dependency which was suggested by my counsellor. Did some deep soul diving to dig out the painful past. I had a good friend who had been through similar and she nursed me through the very black days. My faith didn’t help at that time because I felt like God had abandoned me too and after all my abuser, works for ‘the church’ I was very angry at God for being so cruel and I didn’t trust Jesus because He was supposed to ‘have my back’. What sort of friend let’s this stuff happen to you. Narcissistic abusers are very good at looking like innocent lambs. The covert, altruistic ones are the best at it. I couldn’t talk to family much because of [the above] points. To them he was the best thing since sliced bread... probably still is.' 'Going to anonymous meetings was incredibly helpful in my healing journey too. As well as finally learning and understanding how to see narcissists and sociopaths and see their techniques and therefore avoid.' 'Forgiveness.' 'Forgiveness. Yes very powerful. I forgave more for my own healing, but just because you forgive it doesn't mean you have to take them back or accept their toxic behaviour.' 'Exactly ... [forgive] but never ever go back!!!' 'EMDR therapy helped me heal from the PSTD'. 'Spending two months at The Bridge To Recovery in the US to heal trauma and codependency, my adult self could start to shine as I healed triggers and found I could say “no”. A simple word I couldn’t say to other people out loud. I didn’t even know I couldn’t say the word “no” especially to angry people. And I was 37!' 'The thing that was most helpful in my healing was my Faith but also finding a counsellor that specialised in abuse. I also did a living beyond abuse course and boundary course. I was also able to change states so it was similar to my own witness protection program. I was also very blessed in that I had so much love and support from my new church. You have to be careful who you trust but I was so blessed I had strangers help me when I had nothing.' The messy purple art [above] represents the chaos of domestic violence to me. And the bird on the wire under the moon represents the peace of freedom after leaving, yet social isolation - the devastating impact of the psychological abuse. With the gruesome murder/suicide of Hannah Clarke and her three children this week by her alleged high profile NRL player husband ... it's time to reflect on the Australian epidemic of domestic and family violence. Living at risk of homicide must end! The article below, on #domesticviolence, is a well researched snapshot of the epidemic of gendered violence in Australia. It is a pertinent 4 min read. Brisbane car fire killings of Hannah Clarke and her three children leave Australia reeling amid calls for action on family violence Be the voice and join the conversation among other female survivors. If you are in a relationship and concerned about symptoms of PTSD, anxiety, depression, panic ... with a gut feel things aren't right ... trust your gut! You are not alone and deserve to live in peace and freedom. If you are a man and find your relationships are going south because of your use of violence, coercion or control - help is available. If you find you're not motivated for behaviour change ... your kids deserve it. Love & light Tania Support: Whole Warrior Solutions, Virtual & face to face counselling Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800 https://kidshelpline.com.au/ National Domestic Violence Line 1800 RESPECT, 1800 737 732 for women & support people, live chat online www.1800respect.org.au/ Domestic Violence Court Advocacy Service for women https://www.dvrcv.org.au/support-services/national-services National Australian Men's Referral Service 1300 766 491 live chat online https://www.ntv.org.au/get-help/live-chat Suicide callback service 1300 659 467, 24/7 Headspace on 1800 650 890 for teens & youth Read more:/ No to Violence & Men's Behaviour Change Network for workers, students & advocates for change #endmensviolence #humanrights #narcissism #consequencesforcrimes #recovery #saynotoviolence #notoviolence #genderedviolence #genderdiscourse #orangetheworld #domesticviolenceawareness #endvictimblaming AuthorTania Gorry is a Social Scientist, Counsellor and Social Welfare Worker in private practice on the Central Coast of NSW specialising in spiritual abuse. Tania has worked for 20 years in domestic violence as a women and children's advocate, coordinator of refuges, child protection advocate, Men's Behaviour Change Program Caseworker, Joint Investigation Response Team senior caseworker, Domestic Abuse Response Team senior caseworker, and researched Aboriginal Out of Home Care and made recommendations for FACS NSW to reduce the over representation of First Nation People in foster care. Tania is a tireless advocate lobbying for change in a broken system for the recovery, empowerment and protection of women and children from the modern slavery of domestic and family violence. |
AuthorTania Gorry is the founder of Whole Warrior Solutions based on the Central Coast of NSW. Blog Categories
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